Dumb Joke – Chatty Parrot

There was an elderly woman looking for a pet that would make a good companion yet not too much trouble to care for. Upon her visit to the pet store, a young man showed her around and finally suggested a parrot. He guaranteed her it would be a wonderful companion. The woman asked if it would behave if she took it to church with her on Sundays. The young man said it was well trained and shouldn’t be a problem. She could put him on her shoulder during service and he would stay there.
So she bought the parrot and for the next week she spent time getting to know him. Satisfied that the parrot was well behaved, she put him on her shoulder and off to church they went. Just as everyone quieted down and the sermon began, the parrot looked around, squawked and said, “It’s pretty damned cold in here!”
She was so embarrassed when everyone turned to look at her that she just ran out of the church. All the next week, she talked to the parrot explaining the necessity to remain quiet during church. The parrot acted as if it understood. So she put him on her shoulder and went to church the following Sunday. Once again, just as everything got quiet and the sermon started, the parrot squawked, looked around and loudly proclaimed, “It’s pretty damned cold in here!” And again the embarrassed woman ran from the church.

The next day she returned to the pet store and asked to see the owner. After explaining the embarrassing situation to the owner, she said that she had become attached to the bird and would prefer to keep it. Since she didn’t want to get rid of the parrot, the owner offered some advice. If the parrot does that again, grab him by the legs and swing him around 5 or 6 times and return him to your shoulder.”

“Will that really work?” asked the woman.

“Guaranteed!” exclaimed the owner.
So, the next Sunday she took the parrot to church and, sure enough, just as the sermon started, the parrot squawked, “It’s pretty damned cold in here!” This time, without any hesitation, the woman grabbed his legs, swung him around 5 or 6 times and placed him back on her shoulder. 
The parrot ruffled its feathers and after a few seconds shook his head and squawked, “Pretty damn windy too!”

10 thoughts on “Dumb Joke – Chatty Parrot

  1. OK Jerry, I’m glad you liked my gambolling story and I went and checked out your blog. I might have to make it a regular thing. And I’ll throw a few jokes at you now and then too.
    Regards from down under.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. DAD and Dave are in the big smoke and, not being used to the traffic, Dad gets knocked over while crossing a busy road.
        Dave phones the ambulance on his mobile.
        “Get an ambulance here quick, he’s bleeding from his nose and ears and I think both his legs are broken.”
        “What is your location sir?”
        “We’re outside 28 Eucalyptus St,” Dave says.
        “How do you spell that sir?” asks the operator.
        She can hear nothing but heavy breathing.
        After a minute she asks again, “Are you there sir?”

        –– ADVERTISEMENT ––
        She hears more heavy breathing and another minute later she says again, “Sir, can you hear me?”
        Dave eventually comes on the line.‘
        Yep, sorry about that …I couldn’t spell eucalyptus, so I just dragged him round to 3 Oak St.”


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