A ridiculous tale – The Great Back Stabbing…

Now this is the way I remember the story going. I could be wrong, I was only 5 at the time.

“Mother, might I have a piece of your deliciously fried chicken. You make the best there is in all the world,” I asked.

She looked at me with love in her eyes and said, “I’m sorry my precious son, the favorite of all my children, but you will have to wait until your father gets home. Then we shall all eat together. It would be a shame if your father was deprived of your company. It will be so wonderful to sit at talk with you. You are the best son any parent could ever ask for.”

“ Oh I do understand dear mother, I shall wait patiently like a dutiful son. Gee I sure love you. Is there anything that I might help you with?”

So there I, was sitting patiently and watching her frying her chicken and singing. I was thinking how great it was to have such a fantastic mother.

But suddenly my evil brother Phillip came slinking out from the shadows. He had an evil grin on his face, and a cloak half covering his head. Being the horrible brute that he was, he informed her that he was in a hurry and could do whatever he wanted because he was a big brother. He grabbed a piece of that chicken off the plate and went running out the back door. “Bwaa…Haa…Haa,” he laughed as he ran out.

Now with that turn of events, my mother quickly spun around and with that fork still in her hand, started shaking it in his direction. “Just for that young man, you will have to do without your sup…” That fork, slippery from chicken grease, went sailing out of her hand with the accuracy of a cruise missile and with divine providence stuck smack dab in the middle of his back.

You would have thought that she had stabbed him in the back with a machete the way she ran to him. I mean, she was all over him…hugging and kissing and praying.

“Oh my goodness mother,” I said. “I do hope that my dear precious brother is alright, but if you’ve killed him, may I have his piece of chicken?’

20 thoughts on “A ridiculous tale – The Great Back Stabbing…

  1. HA! I snorted loudly! 😀
    I’m sure that’s exactly how it happened! 😛 And I’m SURE you were the favored child! 😉
    HA! Love the ending! 😛 Ha! In a family of that size, it just means more food for those left! 😉
    HUGS!!! 🙂
    PS…I had to guard my plate at every meal. A few of my seven siblings would just grab food off my plate without permission and gobble it down. 😮 😦

    Liked by 1 person

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